How to Share Parenting Time After a Divorce

Deciding how you will share your child’s time between parents is one of the first things most parents think about after a divorce is contemplated. It seems like a simple enough question but there really is a lot to consider. Start by considering your child’s needs and use that to help guide your decisions. Next review the questions below with the other parent to help you better plan  your parenting time schedule.

  • Where will your child live and go to school?
  • Is this the home he/she will continue to have as her primary residence?
  • What is the time breakdown for your child and each parent?
  • What schedule works best for your child?
  • What schedule works best for each parent?
  • Where will each parent live/What if the other parent lives in a different geographical location?
  • Who will be providing the transportation?
  • Where will your child spend vacations, holidays, and special events?
  • What holidays will your child celebrate?
  • Do you want your child to participate in certain cultural events?
  • How will your child’s time off from school be spent?
  • In what way and how far in advance will you communicate with the other parent about special events or vacations?
  • Who will be the physician?

There is a lot to consider when deciding how to allocate time between parents. But, if you discuss these items in advance, and have a plan going in, it could save you a huge headache down the road.

This divorce and parenting legal advice was brought to you by our MN Family Law Lawyers .

Parenting Resources in Minnesota

If you are a parent in Minnesota, please be aware of the many family education programs available to you and your family.  A simple search for “Parenting Classes MN” can give you in seconds resources such as parenting classes in Minnesota, parenting support groups, and workshops for families struggling with divorce or separation.

Because parenting is such a personal topic, you may feel nervous or embarrassed to ask for help.  With the number of resources and communities out there however, you should embrace new ideas and group sessions.

We work with families dealing with an array of different family law issues and are able to tailor our experience and knowledge to your case.  We want the best outcome for your family and often services such as parenting classes or mediation are a step in the right direction.

Please contact our St Paul family law office if you have a case you would like to discuss with one of our attorneys.  651-222-6341.

 

Mandated Parent Education in Minnesota

When filing for a divorce in Minnesota, you are required to attend an education program.  The class “Parents Forever” is offered through the University of Minnesota Extension and you can find the class listings here.  The classes are available throughout the metro area and range in price from $50-$90.

These classes are designed to give the parents tools to help their children through the divorce.  The class teaches parents about the impact of divorce on children and how as a family you can find an agreeable way to move forward with your lives.  More information on the “Parents Forever” program can be found at their website here.

At Wolf, Rohr, Gemberling and Allen P.A. we want to work with your family to find the best resolution and to make sure both parties are compliant in divorce requirements, such as parent education classes.  Contact us today to learn more about our Family Law Attorneys and get a consultation.

 

Parenting Styles Part II: How to Incorporate Positive Parenting Techniques

As indicated in the previous post, utilizing a Positive parenting style is integral in helping your children build more self-confidence, increase social skills, and perform better in school. If you realized you were using one of the other parenting styles and want to know how to transition into a Positive Parenting style below are some ideas. If you are not doing these, maybe it’s time to re-evaluate and incorporate some, if not all, of these tactics. Continue reading “Parenting Styles Part II: How to Incorporate Positive Parenting Techniques”

What Kind of Parent are You?

Everyone has a different approach to parenting. How you decide to parent your child can come from a combination of factors, but mainly your parenting style comes from how you were raised. There are four basic parenting styles.

Knowing which one you use can help you to understand why you react certain ways and how each action can positively or negatively affect your child. Likewise, knowing your spouse’s parenting style will help you recognize how they approach situations.

Whether you are married or divorced it is helpful to understand which styles of parenting your children are receiving from each parent. Continue reading “What Kind of Parent are You?”

Minnesota Family Lawyers on Children and Parent Relationships

Divorce can be a difficult and emotionally draining situation, and when children are involved the process can become even more complicated. But for your children’s well being, one important thing to remember is to be supportive of the child’s relationship with the other parent. This is sometimes not an easy stance to take, especially if there is still anger or hurt present. Continue reading “Minnesota Family Lawyers on Children and Parent Relationships”

Minnesota Family Law on Presenting Your Parenting Plan in Court

During a divorce and custody battle the courts main concern is the well-being of your child. Ideally you and the other parent would work together to create a parenting plan that suits everyone involved. This is optimal because you know your child best, you have a say in how they are raised, and then it makes it easier for the judge to approve. Additionally, it is much more cost effective to not involve the court in your parenting decisions. In the event you don’t come up with a parenting plan to present to the court, then it will be up to the court to determine how you should raise your child.
In both cases the judge will ask you questions to ensure the best interest of your child is taken into account. Below is a list of some typical questions the judge may ask. These are good things to proactively think about prior to making your court appearance.
Continue reading “Minnesota Family Law on Presenting Your Parenting Plan in Court”

Meeting to Discuss the Parenting Plan

We’ve talked about the importance of creating a parenting plan, and how the individual ages of your children will play a significant role in that plan.  As you prepare to have that meeting with the other parent, here are a few tips to make it a successful one.
Pick a Location
Choose a place to meet the other parent that is neutral for both parties and quiet enough to concentrate on the matter at hand.  This should be a safe place where both of you can discuss the necessary topics without feeling threatened or oppressed.

Set Expectations for Duration
Set realistic expectations ahead of time for how long the meeting will take.  Be sure to give yourselves enough time to accomplish your goals, but don’t spend so much time at once that you’re tempted to become frustrated or exhausted.  If necessary, plan for two shorter meetings instead of one long, grueling one.

Prepare to Listen and be Respectful
Arrive at the meeting ready to genuinely listen to each other.  If all you’ve planned for is talking, that may be all you do.  Know in advance that the meeting will work best if each party makes conscious effort to listen quietly for part of the time.  In addition to listening, prepare yourself to speak respectfully to the other parent.

Be Ready to Admit When You’re Wrong
Mistakes happen, and your meeting is likely no exception.  Being mature enough to apologize when those mistakes are made, or when the wrong thing slips out, will show the other parent that you’re taking this seriously.

Stay Focused
It might help to periodically remind yourself why you’re at this meeting.  You’re creating a parenting plan for your kids.  Focus on your children at every step, and keep the meeting concentrated on what’s ultimately best for them.  To that end, be specific at all times, and don’t assume the other parent knows exactly what you mean.

Relax
If you go into the meeting tense, angry, or nervous, there’s a good chance it will be both ineffective and unpleasant for you both.  If it helps, agree on a good breaking point to stand up, drink some water, and take a few deep breaths.  You can control yourself, and staying relaxed makes it much easier.

Know When to End the Meeting
If either party is having difficulty with any of these, or if tensions simply run too high, acknowledge it openly, and agree to give it another try when you’re both more up to the challenge.  It will help if you’re determined to make this meeting work, but not if your determination supersedes your judgment or ability to reason.

Consider these tips, brought to you by our  divorce attorneys , and remind yourself what’s most important–not just for the parenting plan, but for your children in the long term.  We’re here to help; if you have questions, or are interested in learning more about our services, please let us know.

Minnesota Family Lawyers on Reducing Conflict

As Minnesota family law lawyers with relevant experience, we know that conflict at home is never desirable.  One of the keys to a more fulfilling home environment is learning how to reduce the conflict that, at times, seems unavoidable.

A great place to begin is by recognizing the conditions that often lead up to, or enable, the conflict.  Consider the most recent conflict you witnessed or were a part of, and think about what topic or disagreement was at its root.  By pinpointing some of those “trigger” topics, you may be able to better control when or how some of conflicts arise.

Continue reading “Minnesota Family Lawyers on Reducing Conflict”

How to Help Children Coping with a Divorce

Coping with a divorce is difficult for everyone involved, but it can be particularly difficult for your children. When you’re not even sure how to deal with the situation yourself, it’s confusing to try to help to help your children cope, too.

A good, simple rule is to be as open and honest as you can about the details of the divorce that will impact your children’s lives, while accepting their emotions, even if you’re surprised by these reactions. Continue reading “How to Help Children Coping with a Divorce”